If you’ve been reading my blog you’ll know that Teacher and I are trying to make green choices whenever we can. That’s why I was so excited to discover that our hosting company, Elemental Muse, is using the wind to power its servers!

Read all the details in Elemental Muse’s blog, then take a moment to calculate your carbon footprint.

A couple of weeks ago I was sitting in Lovely Nails getting French tips for the first time in my life and watching the Weather Channel. Only because it was on, I’m not addicted to it like our friend Bill is. I swear it! A nasty storm was supposed to hit within half an hour so as soon as my nails were dry I rushed out, racing the storm home. Well, not really racing because I only went “a little bit” over the speed limit. I smudged two of my nails putting on the seatbelt - darnit - but made it in plenty of time. No tickets yet, bwa-ha-ha!

Teacher and College Boy were cleaning out the gutters so I warned them about the approaching storm. Being guys they weren’t afraid of any storm and were determined to finish with the gutters so they kept working. I scrambled around the back yard gathering up toys to stash safely in the shed. Where were the kids and why weren’t they helping? Not a clue. I think they know when there’s work to do and go into hiding.

I finished just in time - one minute there was nothing, the next minute the sky opened up and it started pouring. I mean POURING!

The thunder, lightening and rain convinced Teacher and College Boy that it was time to come inside. About 5 seconds later the hail hit:

Oh my poor Brunnera!

Oh my poor Petunias!

Bring it on Mother Nature - our gutters are clean and work great! Umm… but hold the tornadoes until the basement is done, ‘K?

OK, right off the bat I’m going to admit that I’m the lowest of the low. I totally suck, big-time. I haven’t posted in forever. OMG, has it really been a month? I’m crawling into a hole now… The only excuse I have is that I’m busy. Sounds pretty pathetic - I mean, we’re all busy aren’t we? But honestly, ever since January I’ve been telling myself “Once summer gets here it’ll be better. Once summer gets here I’ll have time to catch up. Once summer gets here…” Unfortunately the reality is that summer is half over and it’s not better. I’m still not caught up. I still don’t have time. And all I have to look forward to is the beginning of fall and school-year activities. Stresses me out just thinking about it… so I won’t. And you can’t make me!

I wanted to come up with a Top Ten list of things to catch you up with the happenings in our zoo, but I really stink at top ten lists so I thought I’d spare you the agony. You can thank me later.

If I had done a Top Ten list this would be #5 because I was #5 at one point in the Blackhat Fish SEO contest. I didn’t expect to win - honestly, no sour grapes here - my goal was to do what I knew how to do and see where I ended up. I’m not sure exactly what my ranking was when the contest ended because I forgot what day it ended so I didn’t look. Too busy, I’m telling you! I also discovered that there are different databases that Google results are pulled from so a site may have one ranking in one database and another one in a different database. Interesting, huh? Makes it even harder to figure out what my final ranking was. But in any case I’m happy with my results even if I didn’t win buko bucks. How the heck do you spell “buko” anyway? Bucko? Booko? Boucko? Beats me…

I could have put this as #2 because we have two major home improvement projects we’re working on this summer. One is to remodel the main floor bathroom. We spent Fourth of July weekend working on that. I’ll write a separate post with photos later about it later but for now I’ll just say that it’s almost done… almost…

The other project is to remodel the basement playroom. This spring’s torrential rains and melting snow found their way into the finished part of our basement for the first time in the 9 years we’ve owned this house. Now we need to replace the carpeting but first we need to get to it so Teacher and I have launched a massive purging effort. It’ll be a long project, but I think it’ll be worth it when it’s done. I’ll take photos and post about that project as we go along.

So anyway, that’s all for now. I’m done with daycare early today, I have clothes to hang on the line, and a bathroom to paint. Catch ya later… PROMISE!

I’m no spammer, as my recent attempts to promote my Blackhat Fish contest post proves.

I thought I’d pop in to the other contestants’ posts and leave a comment linking to my post, but you know what? It’s hard to come up with comments that include links and don’t look like spam! Plus most of the comments are moderated so I doubt they’ll get approved.

And apparently some blogs don’t support html tags in the comments. I’d been using the url in the post but I think that “http://www.myhappycrazylife.com/blackhat-fish” looks stupid in a comment. On the other hand, the blogs I tried to use html code in didn’t support it so my comment looks even stupider. I’m used to looking stupid - it happens on a daily basis - but I was so hoping to look halfway competent among the pros. (Sigh.)

Oh well, what can you do when you’re a guppy swimming among sharks. At this point I just hope I don’t get eaten!

You’re probably wondering what “Blackhat Fish” means, right? What about SEO, do you know what that is? If you have a blog or a website, especially a business website, you need to know about SEO!

SEO stands for Search Engine Optimization, and it’s the strategies that help your site come up at the top of the SERPS. That means Search Engine Result Pages. Don’t worry I didn’t know it at first either. Of course you know why you want your site/blog to come up at the top of the SERPS - so visitors come to you instead of competitors!

Want proof that SEO works? Google search “wipe solution recipes”… Go ahead, I’ll wait for you! Yup, that’s my page in the #1 spot. Now try “seo training”… the #1 spot there is GNC Web Creations, owned by Cricket who taught me everything I know about SEO.

So how do you take your site or blog to the top of the SERPS? It’s easy, just follow the steps below! I promise to explain about Blackhat Fish too, but if you can’t wait you can learn about blackhat fish now.

First pick ONE page of your site and make sure it’s about only ONE topic. For instance, if my site sells fish: blackhat fish, orangeboot fish, redvest fish, etc, I want each type of fish on a separate page. Why? Because the blackhat fish page will attract the targeted traffic that is looking specifically to buy blackhat fish!

Next choose a keyphrase like “blackhat fish” that tells what the page is about. You need one that is specific, yet something that people actually search for. This keyword tool can help.

Now the fun starts! Start making changes on your page to optimize for your keyphrase:

1. If this is a brand new file you’ll want to name it using the keyphrase, but if it’s an existing file don’t rename it if it’s already been indexed. My filename would be “blackhat-fish” so the URL would be “http://www.myfishsite.com/blackhat-fish.htm.”
2. Title your page with the keyphrase. My title is “Blackhat Fish”.
3. Put in a description meta tag that includes your keyphrase, like “We offer hard-to-find Blackhat fish plus everything you need to care for your Blackhat fish pets!”
4. Add the keywords meta tag: “blackhat fish”. Many sites stuff this tag with every keyword imaginable, but that just dilutes the strength of your chosen keyphrase. Kinda like too much ice dilutes your lemonade.

So far my code looks like this:

Now we start working on the content of our page!

5. Use your keyphrase in the heading tags in your content. Think of your page as an outline like you learned in gradeschool. H1 is the main topic, H2 are subtopics of H1, H3 are subtopics of H2, etc. Try to use blackhat fish - or your own keyphrase - in each heading, but in a natural manner.
6. Use your keyphrase within the content of your site. A good balance will include your keyphrase often while keeping the text readable for your visitors. Check this keyword density tool to see how you’re doing - try for 3-7%.
7. While you’re writing content, try for around 1000 words on your page. I know, I know, that’s a lot of words to come up with! But that’s what Cricket recommends and she’s never steered me wrong.
8. Add alt tags to your image code, using your keyphrase. Alt tags are part of image code that tell visually impaired visitors what the image is. They also display in place of your image if the code is broken. On a photo of a blackhat fish I’d put “Blackhat Fish Swimming”.
9. Speaking of images, be sure to name your image files using your keyphrase. Like “blackhat-fish-swims.jpg”
10. Next add title tags to your link code, using your keyphrase. Title tags help visitors know where a link is going. BUT the tricky thing about title tags is that they benefit the page the link GOES TO. So I’m not going to put “blackhat fish” on the blackhat fish page, I’ll put it on the pages that LINK TO the blackhat fish page. Got it?

This is what my content code looks like:

The final content will look something like this: But the headings won’t be wonky. These are set to the blog so they’re kinda weird… just pretend they’re not.

Blackhat Fish

< - Image alt tag. I don't have a photo of a blackhat fish so it's displaying the alt tag. Cool, huh?

Blackhat fish make fantastic pets! Your child will love having one of our
blackhat fish as a pet.

Blackhat Fish are Easy to Care for

Your child will learn a sense of responsibility caring for her blackhat fish.
Clean their tank once a week and feed them daily, that’s it!

Blackhat Fish are Entertaining

Watch your blackhat fish for hours! Feed them Blackhat Fish Food for healthy growth. < - This link really works, but it leads back to this post. You can still click it if you want.

Finally, to improve your site’s position in the SERPS you need incoming links. That’s where my promise to tell you about Blackhat Fish comes in. There’s a month-long SEO contest going on to see who can rank a blog post highest using the keyphrase “blackhat fish”. Most people are writing something silly about blackhat fish, but I wanted to write something helpful for you as well as enter the contest. That’s why I wrote this huge post using “blackhat fish” in my examples. It’s not just the contest, I really do want you to improve your SERP rankings. But to be honest, I also hope that you’ll link to this blackhat fish post from your blog or links page as a thank-you… and to help me with the contest!

I truly hope you learned something from me, but for the complete who, what, where, when, how and why join Cricket’s classes - they’re fantastic and FREE!

And please, please link to this Blackhat Fish post so I don’t look like a total fool among all the professional SEO-ers in the contest! Use this URL: http://myhappycrazylife.com/blackhat-fish/
Thank you soooo much!

OK quick, grab your purse (wallet for you guys) and tell us what’s in it. NO CHEATING! You can’t put anything in or take anything out. I DARE YOU!

Here’s my list:

• Wallet with 3 checkbooks - family, diaper, childcare - debit card, tons of membership and buy 12 get 1 free cards, all 6 kids’ immunization records, insurance and dental cards, CPR and First Aid certification cards, business cards, various coupons - good and expired.
• Change purse with a little cash, change and a bunch of stickers from the past continuing education meetings I’ve attended.
• A zippered pouch with lip primer, four lipsticks, two lip balms and two glosses.
• My cell phone. The new one Teacher got me for my birthday!
• Two pair of sunglasses; one pink one silver with rhinestones.
• My personal organizer, a twin to Teacher’s.
• Three packs of my new favorite gum: Orbit. One in Maui Melon and two in Mojito - yum! Plus another partial pack of my previous fave: Icebreakers.
• My iPod. Purple of course.
• A pen, until one of the little boys steals it.
• Two hand lotion samples I got as freebies with WAHM purchases. WAHMs are the best!
• A handful of cough drops that are getting soft with age - gross!
• My set of keys: house, van, other van door and backthe dead one, parents’ house key, church outside key, church/school inside key, high school music wing key, Directors get keys to such places! five grocery store membership cards, little light, briefcase key, and four unknown keys I’m hanging on to just in case I need them.

That’s it for me… What’s in YOUR purse/wallet?

Kermit sure had it right when he sang “It’s not easy being green…” Of course, if you’ve seen Sesame Street recently you’ll know that Oscar sings it too, but in my mind it’ll always be Kermie’s song. Teacher and I are discovering just how challenging it is to be green as we try to “greenify” our family.

A loooooong time ago we started going green by using cloth diapers, but that had more to do with being poor than with the environment. More recently we’ve made changes to provide a more healthy home for ourselves and our children, and to help the environment. The fact that we save money is an added bonus!

First we traded chemical cleaners for baking soda and white vinegar. I was always worried about one of the kids getting into a cleaning cupboard by accident, but now I don’t worry so much. To be honest, it took a little while to get used to the sour scent of vinegar when I cleaned, but now the smell means “clean” to me. I could go on and on about how wonderful baking soda and vinegar are, but that’s another subject.

Then we decided to switch from plastic and paper bags to reusable bags. One of the co-ops I’m a member of had some produce and string EcoBags leftover from a co-op. I bought some without telling Teacher - I wanted to surprise him. The same day that the EcoBags arrived in the mail Teacher came home from the grocery store with a bunch of their reusable bags - for less than 1/2 the price I paid for my EcoBags! Mine are much cuter though… at least the string bags are, the produce ones are kinda boring. We’ love our reusable bags! They’re really easy to use… as long as when you bring them into the house filled with stuff, you remember to take them back out to the van before Teacher goes to school so you can use them again. And when you get to the store you need to remember to bring them inside the store instead of leaving them in the van. But once you get the hang of those two little things you’ll be good to go!

Of course nothing can be too easy… remembering to use our new bags caused a new problem - we used up all our plastic grocery bags. I know that sounds like a good thing, but we use plastic grocery bags a lot in our house. They line the garbage cans in all four bedrooms and three bathrooms, not to mention they’re perfect for blow-out diapers and sending the clothes that were a casualty of the blow-out diapers home with daycare parents. Trust me, you do NOT want to be out of plastic grocery bags when facing a 10 month old’s blow out!

The grocery stores used our bags without a problem, but we didn’t get such a warm reception at other stores. Some cashiers forgot to use them until our items were already in plastic. Then they’d put the plastic bag inside our cloth bag - what’s the sense of that?! Then there were the cashiers that gave us The Look when we asked them to use our bags. You know The Look - the one that lets you know without a doubt that you’re just plain nuts. Yeah, I can handle The Look, but that doesn’t mean I enjoy it.

The most recent green thing we’ve done is switching to cloth napkins. This was my brainchild, but Teacher has been sweet enough to go along with it. One day I counted up how many paper napkins I was going through a week with the daycare - it was over 60 napkins, not counting our family’s use! From that moment I was obsessed with the idea of switching to cloth diapers, but being as thrifty cheap! as I am, I didn’t want to buy them when I could easily make them. I decided to use knit fabric because it would be thicker than woven, yet wouldn’t pill like flannel. And one of my favorite co-ops had really cute knits really cheap so it wouldn’t cost a ton to make the switch. But when push came to shove I decided I really didn’t want to take time out of my diaper sewing to make napkins, so Gretchen of Small Wonders Wipes agreed to serge them up for me - at a reasonable rate. The resulting cloth napkins are adorable and the daycare kids love them - they even fight over who gets to fold them for me!

Of course, not everyone is as excited about our green-ness as we are. Teacher and I recently had my whole family over to celebrate Angel Face’s birthday. My whole family is Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Jon, Uncle Mike, Uncle Mike’s wife, and their two boys. We put the cloth napkins out for dinner, and when my sister-in-law asked for napkins and one of the kids pointed to the cloth ones. OK, I admit they’re a bit unusual, being kid-themed. Eventually we’ll get “real” ones for family use, but for now this is it. She looked at them and said “Ohh Kaay…” in The Voice. You know The Voice - the one that lets you know that you’re crazy no matter what words are being said. I wonder what she’d say if she knew the girls and I use cloth pads? But that’s a topic for another time…

It sure isn’t easy being green!

On a Sunday afternoon waaaay back in March I started making a prom dress for Princess. It was the most challenging thing I’ve ever sewn, and the one I’m most proud of. Not because it turned out perfect (it didn’t) or because it turned out beautiful (it did) but because it makes her feel felt like a princess when she puts it on. The smile on her face when she’s in that dress is worth any amount of ripping out, fixing mistakes and cussing. And now that I’ve finally downloaded the photos you can see her smile too. Enjoy!

Princess in her dress. Teacher strung the beaded straps, and the shawl came from our guest from Thailand. Her wrist corsage was gorgeous and smelled as good as it looked!

Princess and Cowboy. Princess had her hair done in a salon, and Cowboy’s sister bullied him into leaving his cowboy boots and hat at home. They both look way too grown-up to me!

Princess with her best friend Janice. Janice made her dress, shawl and matching purse all by herself! My mom made Princess’s matching wristlet - she’s gotten into making purses and bags lately. You can see the girls’ purses in the next photo.

The whole group: Cowboy, Princess, Janice, and her date Josh.

Finally, Princess and me. Teacher wanted a photo of us together since I was still dressed up from band competition. I look at Princess and marvel that I’m the mother of such a beautiful, smart, charming girl. I’m the luckiest mom in the world!

It was going to be a busy night, but not unmanageable. Teacher and I had coordinated schedules and transportation so everything meshed like a well-oiled machine. Easy peasy! Or so we thought…

The plan was:

• 5:00 - Princess would arrive back at school from the Children’s Hospital after dropping off a donation of books she and a bunch of friends had raised funds to purchase. College Boy was picking her up from school because I was still working and Teacher was starting dinner.
• 5:20 - Eat dinner. Teacher was making chicken quesadillas - quick, easy and oh-so yummy!
• 6:00 - Teacher, Jo-Bear and Angel Face would leave for their soccer games. Teacher is the coach for Angel Face’s team, and this year Jo-Bear’s team plays most of its games in the soccer complex near Teacher and Angel Face’s field. How convenient is that?!
• 6:30 - Princess, Z-Man, Little Guy and I would leave for handbells. It was our last night of the year, when we traditionally polish the bells before storing them all summer. Then we go out for ice cream afterward.
• 7:00 - Jo-Bear and a friend would be taken to Badger Sports park by his friend’s dad, who’s also the boys’ soccer coach.
• 8:00 - Jo-Bear would be dropped off at church, a mere 5 minute drive from the ice cream shop, where I’d pick him up.
• 8:30 - Everyone would be home and get ready for bed.

Looks fairly simple, doesn’t it? But of course it couldn’t be that easy… The first wrench was thrown into the works barely 5 minutes after College Boy left to pick up Princess. Princess called to say that she was going to be late getting back to school because the van she was riding in wouldn’t start. And since she was going to be late anyway, could she grab a bite to eat with her friends as long as she got to church in time for handbells? I said she could, then cut the conversation short so I could call College Boy and tell him that Princess didn’t need a ride home.

I called College Boy but he didn’t answer so I left a message. I suspected that he hadn’t taken his phone with him, but I still called every 10 minutes, just in case. As the clock inched past 5:30 I wondered if I should drive up to school to get him. I wasn’t sure how long he would wait since the previous day when he’d gone to pick up his sister he waited a little while, came home, and ended up having to turn right around to go back and get her. I figured this time he’d sit around forever to avoid the extra trip. It’s a good 20-30 minute drive to school and back so I didn’t want to go if I didn’t have to, but I also didn’t want him sitting at school forever. Besides, he had the van with the little boys’ car seats in it!

Teacher offered to stop at school on the way to the soccer complex, but I was worried that they’d be late, so I told him not to worry about it. Instead I called my mom to see if she could watch the little boys while I ran up to school to get College Boy. Teacher was about ready to leave with Angel Face and Jo-Bear so there’d be no-one home with them, and since I didn’t have car seats I couldn’t take them along. While I was on the phone Princess called again to tell us that she’d stopped at school and told College Boy that she didn’t need a ride. I called my mom back to tell her that she didn’t need to watch the boys, and as I was talking Call Waiting beeped again - this time it was Uncle Jon calling just to say “Hi”. I’m ashamed to admit that I was a bit short and rude to him, but my stress level was soaring from the whole College Boy/Princess scenario, plus I still had to clean up dinner, check the diaper bag and get myself and the little boys out of the door on time.

As I said “Goodbye” to Uncle Jon College Boy drove up in the van. Whew! I took a deep breath, and quickly made him two quesadillas for dinner before leaving. He’s lazy and would rather not eat than make something for himself. The little boys were very cooperative and helped find their shoes, socks and coats so we were able to leave on time. The boys and I arrived shortly after everyone else, and with all the hands helping it wasn’t long before the bells were polished and we were on our way for ice cream!

The members of the bell choir all get along very well together and time just flew as we chatted and laughed over our ice cream. Suddenly it was 5 to 8 and I had to run back to church to get Jo-Bear. The little boys were still working on their ice cream so I left them there with Princess and my dad, who’s a member of the bell choir. I figured it would take 10 minutes to run back to church, pick up Jo-Bear, and get back. Silly me, I should have known that it wouldn’t be that easy!

At 8:15 Jo-Bear still hadn’t arrived. I was getting tired of waiting in an empty parking lot, worried about how the little boys were behaving at the ice cream shop, and worried about where Jo-Bear was. My dad didn’t have his cell phone with him He rarely does so I called my friend Cindy’s cell phone instead. I figured she’d be hanging around the ice cream shop with everyone else until I came back. I was right, and she relayed the message that Jo-Bear hadn’t arrived yet. Then I called my mom to ask her if Jo-Bear had arrived at her doorstep, or if maybe he was at home. My parents live just two doors down so the kids go to their house if they’re ever locked out of ours. Jo-Bear wasn’t at Grandma’s, and when she walked to our house to see if he was there he wasn’t. I settled down to wait, and wait, and wait.

I’m not very patient and after about 15 more mind-numbing minutes I couldn’t take it. I called home to see if Teacher had arrived back from his soccer game yet, and have him check the phone for messages. He was home but there was no message. I began to worry that there was a miscommunication and Jo-Bear had been left out at Badger Sports Park for us to pick him up, so I called Cindy’s cell phone again. I suggested that my dad leave the little boys with Princess and come to church to take my place so I could pick up Princess and the little boys. He arrived shortly after and offered to stay at church so I could run out to Badger Sports Park after the ice cream shop. My dad’s an absolute jewel, even if he never carries his cell phone with him.

As I pulled into a parking space at the ice cream shop my cell phone rang. It was Jo-Bear, calling to say that they’d “run over a little” because they were having so much fun. It was 8:45 - I’d say they’d gone over “a little”! Jo-Bear’s friend’s dad had offered to take Jo-Bear home, but since they were just up the road I told him to go to church instead and to “tell Grandpa that you talked to me and he should take you home.” I figured that since my dad had been so accommodating the least I could do was let him take Jo-Bear home right away instead of waiting for me to stop by church and tell him to go home.

Inside the ice cream shop the little boys were entertaining Princess, Cindy, another bell choir member, Diane, and the rest of the patrons. Little Guy was running around in circles like the Energizer Bunny and Z-Man was singing the ABC song. Luckily the boys are so cute no-one seemed to mind! Princess and I packed them up and headed home, thanking Diane and Cindy for staying around to help out.

Although things didn’t go like we’d planned, causing unnecessary stress and worry, this fiasco taught me two valuable lessons: First, don’t let the kids go anywhere with anyone except their parents or grandparents. OK, I realize it’s not realistic, but it would make life MUCH less stressful!Secondly, always, always, ALWAYS carry your cell phone and make sure it’s charged and on!

This purple theme is the third blog theme I’ve had since I started blogging, and believe it or not I’m considering another one. It’s all Anna’s fault - she clued me into The Slovanian Designer yesterday. When I took a peek I instantly fell in love with the African theme. The only thing holding me back is that the African one doesn’t have any purple on it… and the fact that I paid a designer to find and upload this theme for me so I hate to change it so soon. Plus I love the fonts and arches in this theme… but that African one is so gorgeous and so unique… if it had a zebra or two and a bit of purple I’d be all over it. Yeah, I know I’m waffling - I’m really good at not making up my mind.

Anyway, I liked the African theme so much I just had to peek at the rest of page, and to my surprise there was more than just templates! Moni has graphics he’s created and photos he’s edited too. I love looking at this kind of stuff and was amazed by the model in the snow. I’m learning to edit photos but I don’t think I’ll ever be good enough to add snow where there wasn’t any before! Hint, click on the photo to see the entire thing. I won’t admit how long it took me to figure that out.

Do me a favor - take a peek at Moni’s blog then come back and tell me what you think!