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Day 04 – Something you have to forgive someone for.
I’d like to say I have thick skin, but the truth is that my feelings are too easily hurt. I tend to take things personally despite adopting “Q-tip” Quit Taking it Personally as my new mantra. Luckily my tender feelings are balanced out by what I call a “mind like a steel sieve” – meaning that I forget things.
Lots of things.
All the time.
That’s a good thing when it comes to hurt feelings. Although it stings at first, the incident soon slips my mind and I go on with my life happily oblivious to the number of times my feelings have been hurt.
Ignorance is bliss.
But occasionally an incident will stay with me. I don’t know if it was my surprise and shock at the time, the nonchalant attitude with which the phrase was spoken, or the unexpected source, but one incident left a lasting impression.
At the time I just brushed it off. If you’d asked me about it when it happened I’d have said it was no big deal; just a stupid comment. But when I was contemplating this blog post, this was the only incident that came to mind.
It happened when I was in college. I was standing in my sorority’s hallway, waiting to get a drink from the bubbler. Water fountain, for you non-Wisconsinites. The sorority sister ahead of me was a year younger than I and in the pledge class after mine. She turned away from the bubbler and said “something something something sorority slut something something.”
I really don’t remember what she said except those two words. I know it doesn’t sound like much; I’ve heard much worse in my life.
But it hurt.
Sure, I’d gotten “marriage” and “baby carriage” backwards but I definitely didn’t live up to that label.
My face must have reflected my surprise and hurt, because she tried to laugh it off: “I’m just kidding!”
I don’t remember what I said or did, but since I don’t like to make a scene I probably laughed too.
On the outside.
Kidding or not, words hurt.
Kidding or not, I never looked at that sorority sister the same way again.
And although I do think I’ve forgiven her, I don’t know if I’ll ever forget.
Words hurt.
Especially carelessly unkind words from someone you thought was your friend.
Someone you considered a sister.
Ouch.
Image credit: Forgive by hollyhennypenny on Flickr.
Past Days:
Day 01 – Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 – Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 – Something need to forgive yourself for.
Future Days selected from the following:
Day 05 – Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 – Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 – Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 – Someone who made your life miserable, or treated you like dirt.
Day 09 – Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 – Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 – Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 – Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 – A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 – A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 – Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 – Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 – A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 – Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 – What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 – Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 – (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 – Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 – Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 – Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 – The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 – Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 – What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 – What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 – Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 – A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.
My actual (estranged) sister said something similar to me at our father’s funeral visitation.
Yes, I had a child out-of-wedlock, gasp!! I was too busy grieving to even respond. If we ever meet again, I wonder if she’ll even remember. Doubtful. Bullies never remember their victims, nor their own bad behavior. Forgive, easy. Forget, hmmmm.
Carol,
From family at a funeral? Unbelievable. I don’t even know what else to say. I can see why you’re estranged – it’s probably better that way. 😉
~Amy Sue
This kind of thing happened to me in high school but not really from anyone I cared about so I don’t even remember everyone who said things. The best part is, I’m living my life the way I wanted despite my teen pregnancy and I’ve got a sweet little girl to enjoy too.