Day 01 – Something you hate about yourself.
Remind me why I decided to do the 30 Days of Truth again?
Didn’t I say it would be fun or something?
Day 01 was a challenge right off the bat. There are lots of things I’d like to change about myself, but at first I couldn’t think of anything substantial.
Sure, I’d love to lose those last 10 pounds I’ve been struggling with for the past mumble years.
Sure, if we had the money I’d think about considering LASIK.
Sure, I’d like to be more patient with Teacher and the kids, I’d like to never have laundry in the dining room, to get caught up with the ironing, to have a picture-perfect June Cleaver house.
But none of those things seemed “big” enough to kick off these 30ish Days.
After letting it stew in the back of my mind it came to me…
I get too focused on WHAT and forget about WHO.
I vaguely remember taking a quiz many, many years ago. The quiz was supposed to help you identify your personality traits and the role you take in group situations. I don’t remember the four classifications, but I do remember the two I scored highest in goal-oriented and lowest in people-oriented.
No surprise to Teacher or my family, I’m sure.
I know that I tend to get so focused on a task that I can’t think about anything else – including the people around me – until it’s done. I know that people are most important and the rest can wait, but in the heat of the moment I hear myself telling the kids “Not right now; Mommy’s working.” or “In a minute; when I finish this…” but “just a minute” is always, always more than a minute.
That’s not the way I want to be, but it’s not easy to change.
Now we come to the hard part.
Right now I’d love to tell you how how I triumphed over my bad habit… but I haven’t yet.
Second-best would be to outline my plan for making the change… but I don’t have one yet.
Can it can even be done? On which side of the “nature vs nurture” debate, does this fit?
I don’t know.
But I do know that the people in my life are way more important than any To Do list, sink full of dishes, blog post, order to fill, or anything else.
Important enough to change the habits of a lifetime for.
Wish me luck – I think I’m going to need it.
PS- If you’ve got any suggestions I’m all ears!